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Marriage Encounter is Enriching Experience

Alfredo Gonzalez

“We are like teenagers in love, but richer.”

Any couple that has been enriched by their experiences with Worldwide Marriage Encounter (WWME) could have spoken these words said by 66 year-old Dora Gonzalez. Dora and her husband Raul, who is also 66, are rich in more than wealth. WWME has enriched them in love and faith.

WWME, according to the history of the movement, has as its focus “the development of an open and honest relationship within marriage and learning to live out a Sacramental relationship in the service of others.” More than 1.5 million couples have gone through the program since its founding in 1952 by Father Gabriel Calvo, a Spanish priest. Father Calvo asked couples to reflect “upon themselves, their relationship with each other and with God.”

Contrary to popular perception, Marriage Encounter is not designed for marriages in trouble, but rather for marriages seeking a renewal of a dulled passion.

“After being married for nine and a half years and having three children, our conversations were mostly about the children, their school work, doctors' appointments, and what needed to be done around the house,” Dora recalls about why she chose to go to a Marriage Encounter Weekend. “I also yearned for the deep intimacy of our early years of marriage when our conversations just seemed to flow. We would occasionally escape for the weekend, just the two of us, and we would have a great time, but only to return to the same routine, the same rut.”

Raul went, as do most husbands, because his wife nagged him to go. The couple, married 42 years now, have been active in Marriage Encounter 33 years. That is nearly as long as Marriage Encounter has been in the United States. Father Calvo’s “Encuentro Conjugal” was brought to the United States in 1967. Within five years, the movement had spread throughout the United States, including Texas. Today the movement can be found in 88 countries.

Representatives from the World Council of Worldwide Marriage Encounter will come to Texas May 14-20 to discuss the status and future of the movement. The World Council meets every eight months in a different part of the world to ensure its continuing renewal mission in the Catholic Church. Eight couples and eight priests from Asia, the South Pacific, Pan-Africa, Europe, the United States, Canada, and Latin America will meet at the Cedarbrake Retreat Center in Belton, Texas.

Raul and Dora Gonzales attended their first Marriage Encounter weekend at the Oblate Retreat Center in San Juan, Texas in July 1973, one year after the movement reached Texas. Since then they have held many positions in Marriage Encounter, including circle leaders, area leaders, served on the National Board of Worldwide Marriage Encounter, National Leaders for Marriage Encounter in Spanish, and have presented many team training weekend and workshops for presenting team couples and team priests. They also helped Marriage Encounter get started in Bolivia and Brazil.

“Before we attended the Marriage Encounter Weekend, we were not involved in our parish,” Raul said. He and Dora learned their faith at St. Joan of Arc Catholic Church in Weslaco but today are members of St. Ignatius Martyr Catholic Church in Austin.

“After attending the Marriage Encounter Weekend, we chose to become an integral part of our parish. We have served as Eucharistic Ministers, Parish Council President (as a couple), hospital ministry, presented talks on the Sacrament of Matrimony at Youth Retreats, and have served on various Ecumenical boards in the United States.”

Raul, who also has the distinction of being the first Mexican-American to win a statewide elected office in Texas when he won a seat to the Texas Supreme Court, said that before he and Dora attended their Marriage Encounter Weekend their “marital relationship was stagnant.”

“Marriage Encounter put the spark back into our marriage and our relationship has become fun again,” he said. “We have not arrived; we are not perfect but there is now more passion, romance and intimacy as a result of our continued involvement in Marriage Encounter. We have grown emotionally, and spiritually.”

Dora said the Marriage Encounter lifestyle brings them “a lot of joy and peace.” “It invigorates our relationship with God, each other, and with those around us, especially our family,” she said. “It keeps us young.”

Conflict and stress in marriage are inevitable. Marriage Encounter provides couples the tools to deal with bumps on the road and take the marriage relationship to a higher level, added Raul.

“We thank God for bringing Marriage Encounter into our lives,” Raul said. “We strongly recommend and encourage all married couples who love each other, to give the gift of a Marriage Encounter Weekend to one another.”

For locations of Marriage Encounter weekends, visit www.wwme.org. Couples can also find many useful guides to improving their marriage at these Web sites.

Marriage Encounter alumni can meet World Council members at an old fashioned Texas barbecue at Sacred Heart Church located 5909 Reicher Drive in Austin on Saturday, May 20. The event is a bon voyage for the World Council members and includes a mass at 2:30 to be celebrated by San Antonio Auxiliary Bishop Patrick Zurek.

Jose and Marilyn Garcia of Austin and Father Len Stegman of San Antonio are leaders for WWME Section 10, which includes Texas, Oklahoma and New Mexico, and will serve as hosts. For more information contact Charlie and Mary Copeland at (512) 388-4616 or visit the World Council meeting website: http://www.dfwme.org/worldcouncil.

“Thanks to Marriage Encounter, we are having the time of our lives,” Raul said. “Our relationship is characterized by prayer, passion and playfulness.”

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