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Pastoral Letter on the Sacrament of Matrimony

Archbishop Raymond G. Hunthausen (Archdiocese of Seattle, Retired)

(Excerpted from the September-October 1982 Worldwide Family Spirit magazine)

My Dear People:

Today the Catholic community hears much about family life, the responsibilities of parents, and the religious formation of children within the home. Fundamental to each of these concerns, and encompassing them all, is sacramental marriage. Our purpose here is to explore the riches of matrimony, the sacrament of Catholic married couples.

Sacramental marriage is a vocation, or call from God, to take part in the life of the church in a special way. We can best understand this by first recalling the God-given meaning of marriage from the beginning, before it was raised to the dignity of a sacrament by Christ. God's original intention was that marriage be a sacred institution: "A man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). Marriage is thus a natural human right, a means of completing one's personhood in an exclusive and permanent union with one's spouse. On such a union of man and woman depends not only the fulfillment of the married couple, but also the stability of family life, and the health of society as a whole.

Under the Old Testament, God gave the institution of marriage a formally religious meaning. To this day the Jewish people regard marriage as a "covenant," that is, a solemn commitment on the part of man and wife to mirror the very love which God has for Israel as a people. In a similar way, our Protestant brothers and sisters proclaim the sacredness of marriage from a Christian perspective, considering the relationship of husband and wife to be a permanent, sanctifying bond.

Catholic tradition goes a step further. We identify marriage as a sacrament, that is, one of seven unique channels of redemptive grace brought forth in the church by Christ himself. When we say that marriage is a sacrament, we say more than that marriage is a sacred covenant and a sanctifying union. While including these realities, the sacrament of matrimony also transcends them. For sacramental marriage is a commission from Christ to enrich the church in a singularly important way.

As is true for all the sacraments, matrimony has an essential relationship with the church. As an institution, marriage has an existence apart from the church; the sacrament of matrimony does not. In this context the "church" refers only secondarily to an institution or organization; primarily it refers to people - all the baptized, including the hierarchy, in their common bond of unity in the Lord. Too, the word "sacrament" means more than the wedding rite; it designates the lifelong relationship of husband and wife. Matrimony is not so much something that a couple receives as something that a couple becomes.

Just as there is no reality for baptism apart from people who are baptized, there is no reality for matrimony apart from those who are "matrimonied." Sacramental marriage does not exist in the abstract, but in the concrete relationship of baptized married couples. And as baptized persons are to live out the implications of their baptism on a continuing basis, so sacramental couples make a lifelong, creative response to matrimony. It follows that matrimony has enduring significance for the entire membership of the church; it is not exclusively or even primarily a private matter having to do with the couple's personal welfare. For by undertaking the sacrament of matrimony, husband and wife assume responsibility to sign forth the presence of Jesus in the midst of the church in a unique way, namely, in their married life.

In the history of the church, the sacramental nature of marriage has been constantly affirmed. Our understanding of matrimony, however, has gradually expanded by reflection on the lived experience of church members. As our tradition becomes more mature, the meaning of matrimony becomes fuller. Today we are coming to new insight about what this sacrament implies in practice.

For example, we hear of married people described as "sacraments," or living signs which summon the entire church to greater authenticity in following Jesus and his Gospel. In responding to the vocation of matrimony, married couples sign forth how the people of God are to respond to their shared vocation as the Body of Christ. When a couple is married, the church not only declares: "You need the church to live your sacrament"; it also declares: "The church needs you to be its sacrament . . . become for us a shining beacon; show us how to be more fully Christian."

How do married couples call other church members to more authentic Christian living? Their fundamental witness has to do with what is fundamental to marriage: intimacy and belonging. These qualities are integral to the life of the church.

In marriage, intimacy and belonging are two sides of the same coin. One cannot be had without the other. To belong to someone without intimacy is enslavement; to have intimacy without belonging is debasement. Because of their known commitment to love each other without reserve, all that married couples do in life has enhanced meaning and power. Day by day they proclaim to one another, and to all the world, "Because our love is unconditional, our relationship is one of unconditional belonging and intimacy."

This witness speaks to the church's calling from the Lord: "By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another" (John 13:35). Our experience as members of the church ought to be characterized by a strong sense of belonging and intimate sharing. Devoid of these qualities, what we do in the name of Jesus comes across to others as impersonal and sterile. With these qualities, the good we accomplish testifies that the Spirit of God is among us, makes credible the Good News which we proclaim, and works powerfully to transform the world.

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